bittybat | (no subject)

[ josuke needs to learn how to bake so he can bake damian some HUMBLE PIE!!! ]

It's not a matter of being afraid or not. Did you miss the part where I said this guy might kill you?

It's not a joke. I want you to go home to your folks like the rest of us once we figure this shitty place out. If you're itching for something to do, we can go hunt or something. Come on.

[ Don't do the thing... ]

[please god give this kid some humble pie???]

You assume I'm afraid of dying.

[HE IS, but shh. A little. He's died once. He can't say that, though.]

Make no mistake, I'm going to return home. I'm also not going to let someone go around fighting others without issuing an honorable challenge. Therefore, I'm already hunting. I'm hunting him.

What have I done ... I really shouldn't have told you anything!! Ughhh [ He told Damian about Kamui to warn him to stay away. He didn't expect Damian to do quite the opposite. Wow. ]

Do you know how to deal with strong guys like him, at least? Don't just charge in.

I told you I was gathering information.

[He'll go charging in afterward.]

So you're just going to stalk him? How good are you at that?

[ asking a batkid if he's good at stalking ... josuke please. ]

It's not stalking. It's social research.

It's something I knew how to do at three.

robin ...

what kind of childhood did you have ...?

actually, i really should have asked this ages ago.

That isn't any of your business. I've been trained extensively for these kinds of situations. That's all you need to know.

[AKA his childhood was shit, Josuke.]

doesn't leave room for a lot of fun stuff if you're training so much ...

I don't have time for useless "fun stuff." I won't get stronger without training.

that's true, but you gotta take it easy too, you know? i really think you're way too young to be acting so serious all the time. i heard that's gonna give you hypertension when you grow up.

[ probably inaccurate. ]

Hypertension is caused by a poor lifestyle, kidney disease, or stress. I have none of those. I am one-hundred percent healthy. [Physically...] When I'm older, I will also be perfectly healthy.

of course you'd randomly know that.

what i'm saying is, you're wound up a little ... tight? you should find time to relax once in a while. i fixed up some balls and old board games. if you wanna have a game sometime, i'm around.

I relax plenty. I'm aware of how to meditate.

[There's a lengthy pause between that answer and the next.]

What do I get if I win?

[Josuke knew this, right? He's too tightly wound not to miss the point and only think about winning.]

you get to feel good about yourself? come on, man, it's not like i actually have anything to my name in this town. [ he really only has his clothes and nothing else. ]

uhhh. i'll do what you say for a few hours. [ and he's somehow expecting to be told to do chores again, like with annabeth. maybe josuke should just abandon any dreams of college and become a maid. ]

Deal.

[IT COMES BACK TOO FAST OF A REPLY.]

[ that was way too fast. ] that caught your interest, huh?

[ he feels like he's going to regret it. oh well. also they can probably do this... after the event or something. ] i still gotta go fix up some old games. i'll let you know when we can have a match.

[ they also had something serious they were talking about: ] also, after you go looking for the guy, hit me up to let me know you're fine. Crazy Diamond can heal almost any kind of injury. if you get hurt somehow, i can help you.

[Damian is in love with high stakes, high risks, and high rewards. He also likes being bossy. The worst of the Type As.]

If I require assistance at all, I'll let you know.

How does your Stand heal people? When it happens, do you become fatigued?

[RIP, he won't be able to see fabulous Crazy Diamond anymore now that he's going to kind of forsake the Robin suit in favor of being normal with Dad.]

[ yeah!! being a normal!!!! he can still see Crazy Diamond since Josuke will bring him out for no reason at all. ]

if you're asking about the science behind it all, i've really got no fucking clue. crazy diamond can restore things to a previous state. doesn't take a lot outta me either. i once put some kid back together after they were blown to smithereens.

[Okay, first of all: WHAT THE FUCK. Second of all: what the fuck.]

So you have a power you don't even know anything about. You realize reversing time or restoring matter to a former condition is not simple process.

Typical.

[POWER USERS, UGH.]

[ he was trying to help. why is he being attacked! ]

if he gets the job done, why does any of that even matter?

That method of thinking is exactly why it matters.

It could be used against you. It could get out of control. Plenty of things could happen that put you or others in danger because you aren't aware of its potential or limitations.